1 Corinthians 13:4-6
others, it is not self-seeking,it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
Most people have memorized verse 4
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy,
it does not boast, it is not proud.
But who knows what
comes after that? This is one of the verses that Matt picked out for our family
values so I posted it at work, and read it every morning……..but what stood out
to me was NOT verse 4, but verse 5 the other day
It
does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it
keeps no record of wrongs.
What did that just
say!? Did that just say that my love can’t be selfish? Well then! I have been
loving Matt WRONG! My love is very selfish, I put way to many expectations on
him, sometimes I don’t even know that I have put them on him. I keep record of
what wasn’t done right, or the fact that I had to remind him about something.
WHOA! I MUST stop those actions and live out verse 5 by not getting upset
easily, by putting him first and not being selfish. Loving him as Christ loves me.
Why is it so hard to
love my husband as Christ loves me? And why do I expect that from him but
don’t give it to him?
Through our conversations
I have realized that because I am loving him selfishly that he is more worried about
meeting my expectations and not even giving him a chance to love me fairly because
I have set so much out for him to do, always having a list of things that need
to get done, that's not a fair way to love some one. He has always kindly mentioned that my love is conditional....i never thought it was.....until understanding that verse. Of course if the house is clean, Morgan is in bed on time, healthy, we are eating healthy- its easy to love. But that is not what it is about, that perfect storm does not happen often.
My selfish ways need to be tossed out the window and smashed. I am doing my best to put Matt first and put myself aside, and just loving him for him and who i fell in love with when we started dating, why i even started dating him, before I went to Australia, I told my friends I wasn't going to date anyone unless it was someone special. Well he was surely someone special! He is the love of my life and i have been loving him wrong. I am speechless at the way God works, the blogs i come across, the people that cross my path, my friends, co-workers, how everything ties together, the conversations had that can bring all this to light and also help me start loving my husband the right way, giving him the respect he needs before he walks in the door, taking myself out of the picture.
A few years back a group of women and I went through Praying Wives....i thought it would help Matt...WRONG! it worked on me more then him, it was such a powerful book to go through, but there are enough books on everyone's to read list so here are a couple simple things that can help us all love our husbands better....just by starting to pray for him, keep an eye open for how praying for your husband will affect you!
This was pulled off pinterest that i had to retype to print it:
This was pulled off pinterest that i had to retype to print it:
10 Ways to Pray for Your Husband
I pray
For my husband’s relationship with God
That God would bless my husband
For my husband to be a spiritual leader for our family
For my husband to love me deeply
For my husband to have a heart for his children
For my husband to make wise choices
For my husband’s emotional, mental and physical health
For my husband to prosper at work
For my husband’s power to resist sexual temptation
That I will show my husband respect grace and kindness
My friend Karen received this from her mother-in-law I believe and posted it on facebook, I have printed this one off as well to keep handy
"Make me my husbands helpmate,
champion, companion, friend, and support. Help me to create a peaceful,
restful, safe place for him to come home to. Teach me how to take care of
myself and stay attractive to him. Grow me into a creative and confident woman who
is rich in mind, soul, and spirit. Make me the kind of woman he can be proud to
say is his wife. I lay all my expectations at your cross. I release my husband
of fulfilling me in areas where I should be looking to you. Help me to accept
him the way he is and not to change him. . . I leave any changing needs to be
done in your hands, fully accepting that neither of us is perfect and never
will be. Only you lord are perfect and I look to you to protect us. Teach me
how to pray for my husband and make my prayers a true language of love!"
A Song I will often play when i need to be reminded of this is Love Like that by Dawna Johnson - check it out! This concept of loving unselfishly not only needs to be applied to our spouses but to everyone we come in contact with. It is AMAZING what God can do when we set ourselves aside and love like he does.
